Webinar Replay: Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire!
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Okay. We got Rachel. Are we about ready to roll here, Rachel? How we doing
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Yes, we are. And hello, everyone. Happy New Year and welcome to 2025. So for those of you that I don't know, I'm Rachel Sampson, the National Director of Key for Women and Head of Community Banking here at Key.
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And I want to welcome you to our program today. As you can see, it's going to be a fiery interactive one. So I encourage you to join the chat, post your questions throughout our program to make sure as we will be answering your questions live so tracy
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We'll definitely be taking those on as you can already see. So we're excited today.
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To really set the stage for today's program, I'd like to talk a little bit about what we're going to be talking about today.
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As you know, in today's fast-paced environment. And in often uncertain world, the ability to discern the truth from deception has never been more critical.
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Whether you're negotiating a deal, hiring a new team member, or simply engaging with clients.
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Understanding who to trust can make all the difference in achieving success.
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We've all had experience with moments of doubt when we're unsure if something is And someone is being entirely truthful.
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Perhaps you've found yourself second guessing your instincts And especially when they're high stakes situations.
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Today, that uncertainty will be transformed into confidence. Throughout this session, you'll discover how simple yet impactful strategies can change the way you interact with others.
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You'll learn not only to recognize the nine telltale signs of deception, but also to employ military intelligence skills to help you navigate through complex interactions ensuring that you never fall prey to lies again.
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Will embark on a part one of our two-part series, so make sure you come back next month for part two to uncover the fascinating world of body language and forensic logistics guided by our expert, Tracy Brown.
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Tracy is a body language expert and a leader in training people to build their bottom line by detecting deception. 00:02:19.000 --> 00:02:25.000
She's a frequent guest on TV interpreting the body language of criminals and politicians.
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She even helps lawyers pick and persuade a jury using body language.
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Here's a couple of fun facts. She's got to deal with Kevin Harrington, one of the sharks from the hit ab see TV show, Shark Tank.
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She's a former member of the U.S. National cycling Team. Her new book, How to Detect Lies, Fraud, and Identity Theft is hot.
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Off the presses. And Justin, she's the executive producer of a new TV series Truth lies in cover-ups.
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Today, we are in for some fun and interactive session and she's going to share with us secrets of how exactly how to tell whose pants are on fire.
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So get ready. It's about to get hot in here. Tracy, please take it away.
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All right. Hey, thanks for having me. Let me share my screen here and make sure we're doing all the screen share things.
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Just right. Okay, let's see. All right. What can you see on the screen?
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We currently see the editable slideshow You have to present.
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Oh, no. Okay, let's try that. There we go. Try this. How's this looking?
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That looks great.
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Awesome.
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Excellent. All right. All right. Well, I am super psyched to be with you all today.
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The team here at Key is top notch and we have spent a couple months, maybe more, putting this together For you, two part series.
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I got to tell you, we all have one problem and no one wants to admit it, but we all have this problem and that is that people's pants are on fire around you all the time and you haven't even noticed.
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And those lies, they cost you big. I mean, time, money.
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And energy. So it's a good thing you came today because all that loss stops now. My goal is for you to walk out of here knowing how to tell truth from lies.
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In fact, from fiction. We are going to have a great time. Make sure your chat box is open and we're going to be using that a lot.
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Just think for a minute. How would life be different if people's pants really did catch on fire.
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Whenever they lied. Like things would change. Don't you think like like life would be different buying a used car would all of a sudden be a lot more enlightening. I should think when the when the salesman said, this baby's the best one on the lot. Never been in a rec runs just great. You'd know. Or, um.
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Politics. I mean, we just got out of this big political season, big election season, but I think If this was the case, politicians would have to have firemen following around and hosing down every time they open up their mouth. And ladies online dating would be different too. You'd have to be really careful.
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Who you swiped right on because it turned your phone into a fire hazard, right? So sadly we're never going to see flames when someone lies. But don't worry Because I've got the next best thing. You see, I've been lucky enough to study right alongside our country's top
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Law enforcement, FBI, police, Green Berets people, I believe could not tell me they were in the CIA.
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And I have boiled it down for you here today. You're going to be blown away by how cool this is.
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Because it's all in the body language. Now, I get to use this information on a daily basis. I work on investigations.
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And also the media calls me just about every day to reveal secrets hidden in plain sight.
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In crimes, politics. Billion dollar business deals. And then the really important stuff like If the couple's on The Bachelor are really in love.
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It's fascinating. And I never run out of things to talk about.
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Now, I didn't get started reading body language because I'm involved with FBI or CIA that that you know about.
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Although I think I'd make a pretty good spy. No, I got started reading body language from bike racing. You heard from my intro, I… I did ride for the US national team. It was a great point of pride for me. But when I first started out, I got to be pretty good. But when I first started out, that was not
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The case. I found out really quickly that cycling at its core of the elite level is for little people.
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And I'm a big person. I got five, nine of me to drag around.
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So I had to find some different ways to keep up, right? I couldn't rely on my strength alone. So I started to understand and I started to use this knowledge that people were broadcasting exactly what was on their mind
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Exactly how they were feeling and exactly what was going to happen next. And all I had to do was start to watch more closely the information was right there. And when I could start to react to what was about to happen.
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Even by half a second, like half a pedal stroke that's when I began to win. And I would look for things like the drop of the shoulder, the waggle in someone's hips or Little things like uh that would announce what was going to happen now.
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The things that you're looking for in your world are different than what I was looking for on a bike. But the principle is the same.
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That people are broadcasting exactly what was on their mind Exactly how they're feeling and exactly what's happening next. And everyone has their own unique tells.
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So it's up to you to file those away So that you can have that advantage. Now, I needed it because I jumped into the deep end of cycling without even knowing it. There was this guy, he kept showing up to the races. He was there when I'd race in the men's race.
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His name was Lance. And he was really fast. Yeah. Lance Armstrong right there. Grew up with him in Dallas. We rode on the same bike shop team. We were on Team USA at the same time.
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And there's no joke, that guy's really fast. But he gave me an exposure to lies and fraud at a very early age.
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Because he was one of those guys. And I know that you have people in your life like this. One of those guys that you just know they're up to something.
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And you know it's no good. But you don't know what it is.
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Like, I'm sure you have people like that in your life like you know it wouldn't Or I mean, I suppose it could be.
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Some of your customers at the bank, right? Maybe people on your team, hopefully not, definitely not anyone on this webinar, like not those people, right?
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But if it's not any of those people, it's definitely your kids, right?
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Let's like all those years ago, I just thought i had a hunch.
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About what was going on. And of course, he's the biggest fraud in all of sports, been stripped of seven Tour de France titles from performance enhancing drugs that he only admitted 20 years later.
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And… let's just, I just thought I had a hunch. Now, looking back, the signs were all there. I just didn't know what to look for.
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So let's put some science behind the hunches you have. So you can find the liars.
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In your life. Here we go. Now, first thing you got to do, you got to understand you got to pay attention differently.
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Most of us pay so much attention to ourselves, we're just not paying attention.
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To what goes on outside of us. So that's the number one thing. People dismiss this part. They think it's fluff. This is the most important thing of the day. Everything else is just details. People are screaming at you.
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Exactly what they're thinking in their emotions but Are you catching it? Are you able to stay ahead? Are you answering their unspoken questions?
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And can you head off trouble at the past? We can, but you got to pay attention differently. And I learned this from my coach, Wally. When I got here to the University of Colorado And while he was this big cowboy guy, not the kind of guy you'd expect to be a cycling coach. He was the kind of guy to take us out
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Run us through the hardest workout you could possibly stand and then put you in the car, take you home, cook your hand cut thick bacon sandwich like it was good for you.
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It's the kind of guy Wally was and he'd always tell me this at times that were really inconvenient.
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Times when my lack of attention, as good as I thought I was. Times when my lack of attention was costing me a victory.
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And when you pour your whole life into just getting across the finish line before anyone else and you don't because you're not paying attention.
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That's a lot of pain. And so, yeah.
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Okay.
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So creepy. I got a quick question for you. How do you turn your attention with so many mixed messages and being bombarded and coming into a meeting with a set agenda of things you want to talk about, how do you physically
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Train your brain to pay attention to those signs because sometimes to your point, they are very subtle.
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We're starting easy today and we're getting harder as we go. Now, next time we're going to get real hard. Okay. So you got just a few signs to look for today. You're going to be able to expand that and you're never.
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Going to see people the same way again because you got to pay attention or you pay with pain. And here's the pain in your business. Because I talk to bankers quite frequently and really a lot of business owners. Here's the deal.
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It boils down, the pain of not paying attention. Lost time, lost money, and lost energy. And here's the kicker.
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The real problem is that lies compound. And every time they compound.
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They take you further and further away from the conversation you need to be having.
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Than anyone else. You lie every day. Yes, you. I can hear what you're saying. You're saying, Tracy, I go to church.
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I would never lie. Yes, it's you. You lie every day. Now, not all these lies are big and evil and fraudulent A lot of them are little lies, little white lies to make someone feel better.
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Get out of a conversation more quickly and get on with your day. Things like, have you ever been to your 20, maybe 30 year high school reunion and you see someone across the way, you see them across the way, you hadn't seen them in a while, but what do you do when you see them, you go, you know what? You haven't changed a bit. You haven't changed a bit in your mind. You're going, hmm.
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Time's not been good to them, right? But you don't because you want to be nice. So you say this and uh yeah Really? Now, this is my seventh grade best.
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And if I haven't changed, just don't tell me. Okay, I hope I change for the better. I'll leave it up to you, but I'd appreciate a lie in that department. Now, other lies you may have told.
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Things like my phone, I'm so sorry I didn't call you back. My phone died, right? And now we treat our phones better than we treat our firstborn children, right? Your phone did not die. It just makes you a liar. It doesn't make you a bad person.
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Those are two different things. All right. Now. Otherwise, you may have told things like, you know, I love it when my husband cooks, but sometimes the stuff that comes out of the kitchen is a little questionable.
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But I want to encourage this, right? So I say, honey, that was delicious Let's have it, again, maybe tweak it a little bit, right? So you start to see how prolific lies are.
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In our world now let's see another line. You all are bankers. I know you've done this. Tom I'm in a meeting.
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Tell them I'm in a meeting. I just want to go to your meetings with you, right? Just call me and I will be there with my clubs.
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Now, there's one lie everyone's told. Everyone's told this lie. Yes, I have read and agreed to the terms and conditions on this website okay so um If you have actually read the terms and conditions, we need you out there. You might be a nerd. Keep doing what you're doing and report back to the rest of us because we
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When can I lie? Oh my gosh, this is prolific. Yes, it is. I'm going to give you permission in one little instance to lie.
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When you get asked this question, do these genes make my butt look big?
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You gotta use your wisdom first. Don't take the first thing that comes in to your mind, right? The answer is always no, okay? Because everybody knows it doesn't have anything to do.
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With the jeans. Now, someone got on me Once I got this angry email.
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After this slide. This is a little pug dog. It's a little cute dog. It's not a pig. Okay, relax. It's just a joke okay so Let's talk about this. Different types of lies. And this is, if you're taking notes or taking pictures of the screen, you're going to want
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This is your moment, okay? And this is from my studies with law enforcement, FBI.
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Different types of lies. Fabrication, exaggeration, deceptive denial, minimization, and omissions.
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What's important here is that important they put a different level of cognitive load on the brain. So what that means is the fabrication and exaggeration lies. Excuse me.
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Are going to show more. So omission is like the easiest one and you don't see a lot of tells with that.
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Point being is there's different levels of lies and they put a different level of load on the brain. And we're going to get into the science of that in just a minute because Rachel wanted me to do some science.
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There's this other kind of lie. It's just about, what, six or eight years ago it came out. Alternative facts. 00:16:43.000 --> 00:17:03.000
Actually, it came out on Inauguration day when last time trump was And so this is having an anniversary now I'm saying this because I'm saying i'm saying this because Because it's really important. The alternative facts, like that's just, you know, to get a laugh but
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It's the lies woven into the truth. That really gets you every time, right? So you got to be heads up.
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And like, what are some of the alternative facts your world well um no matter if you're in banking or not, it's like, are your current clients happy or are they shopping around?
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Like that would be important to know, right? So you can get ahead of it and keep them. What about Was that deposit made in the right amount?
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That would be important to know too, right? Our employees working virtually visiting clients or are they doing a dry cleaning run, right? All of these can be sniffed out right when you know what to pay attention to. So let's dive in a little bit more.
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Here's the framework. Here's what we're going to do. Okay. And this is kind of how it works. You got observation And then you got assessment, okay? We're going to focus on these two today.
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Now, it goes on to insight. That means knowing what to do in a situation and then getting it done.
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Okay, so we're focusing on observation and assessment today. Insight, that's up to you. That's case by case. That's contextual. And then you'll know about your strategy. Now, here's the thing. If you miss on observation or assessment, the whole thing falls apart.
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So you're going to pay attention differently and starting easy, getting harder today. I'm going to warn you, this is a one- way street. You are never going to see people the same.
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Way again. Okay. So let's keep going. Oh, here's how it really works. So your mammalian brain in your reptilian brain. They're the ones in charge of your body language, okay? They're the ones in charge of all the things that you don't just think about every day. Things that are deeply unconscious.
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Your neocortex, that's your adult. It's the newest part of the brain. It's uptime thinking, day-to-day logic.
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Consciousness, okay? When your neocortex takes over. Which it'll do during a lie when it's constructing information, it also takes over your body language and that's why things go wrong, okay? That's why things deviate from the norm it's when our new part of the mind
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Gets to go and telling a lie. So that's the basics. And you can dive really deep into this. We are not going to do that today. I'm just letting you know how it's working out.
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Let's see. Let's talk about cognitive load. I mentioned that before. That's the amount of effort required while reasoning and thinking.
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When the load is too high, thought processes, and I'm going to say body language are potentially interfered with.
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So we're looking for moments of cognitive load when the wrong part of the brain is at work, okay?
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And that happens during deception so Let's keep going. The basic premise here. The basic premise, this is where the rubber meets the road, okay?
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Is that the body can't lie. Words can lie. But the body can't lie. Believe the body first. Take the words with a grain of salt. And it goes like this.
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For American people, this means, yes, a head nod, this means yes.
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And this means no. Okay, so you got to look for mismatches between the body language and the words because the body can't lie. So it would look something like this I would never do that.
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Or I had a client do this to me the other day.
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You could ask me anything. I said, I'm right here. I said, what are you hiding, right? Or it can be veiled in sweetness. Like not all wives are evil. It can… It can be something like, that is a beautiful baby.
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I get taken to task on that from time to time.
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This one lady, she marched up to me. She said, oh, babies are beautiful and i said They get there, most of them, eventually, right? So all different kind of lives.
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Or even Bill Clinton did this too. Bill Clinton did this to all of us.
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I did not have sexual relations with that woman. Like right there.
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We want to see things differently and we're going to listen to things differently too. We're probably going to get more into words Next time. All right. But we can talk about this all day.
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But I brought some videos or I have some videos here and I got to warn you, it's about to get hot.
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People's pants are going to burst into flames. So from here on out, whenever we see flames on screen.
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It's going to go like this. I'm going to say a liar, liar. And then in the chat box, you're going to type, you know what to type.
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Hands on fire or as some of my audience members have liked to do hashtag P-O-F. Got it? Okay, because… We got to get some interaction going. Now, if you have questions.
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Yes, I am.
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Type them in. Rachel is monitoring this, okay? And we will get those answered for you so All right, cool. Now, so question is, do we have any members of Bachelor nation with us? Type it in the chat. Rachel, do we have any members of Bachelor Nation with us?
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Anybody willing to admit the guilty pleasure?
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Let's see. Always. I was receiving one or two, but I fell off.
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Well, you know, sometimes there's only so much you can take.
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So we got watchers. All right. All right.
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Yes, we have plenty of watches. Lots. They keep coming. Some no, some no, some yes.
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I'm more of a survivor person myself.
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Are you? Okay, well, okay. Here's the deal. Here's the deal is that if you haven't watched lately, don't worry. I'll catch you up.
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So this is Ben. Some of you might recognize a little fuzzy here. Don't worry. This is Ben. And the drama.
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Was off the charts. I don't know how any of us made it through because ben was in love with two women.
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And he had to propose to one of them because the show was about to end.
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And that's always a good time to propose is on a tight TV deadline. And so Jojo pins him down.
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And let's just see, just knowing what you know now, what do you think about Ben? 00:23:14.000 --> 00:23:15.000
Here we go.
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Like, I haven't asked you, do you think that you're at a place with Whoever that a proposal is what you would want to do?
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Yeah.
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Seen that hundreds of times. Do you think he was ready? Type it in the chat, Rachel. What are people saying?
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Liar, liar, pants. They're really on fire.
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That's right. He was not. He was not ready. He actually proposed to the other girl whose name was, type it in the chat real quick right now, and I will give you a prize.
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What is the other girl's name? This is Jojo. Who was the other girl?
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Does anybody know?
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I don't think… Rachel, oh, that's kind of ironic.
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No, no, that's not right. No, it's not Rachel. I'll give you one more second.
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Oh, okay. All a blur. Allison? Andy, Allie, Andy?
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Oh. No?
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All right, time's up. It's Lauren. Okay, so here's the deal. Watching reality TV does pay, okay? Not for any of you, particularly today, okay?
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But that is one way that you can start to watch people if you don't want to stare down your family or stare down everyone in the boardroom, start watching reality TV. It is Fascinating. It is fascinating. And it'll start to raise your sensory acuity. That's what we're doing is
00:24:39.000 --> 00:24:52.000
Paying attention more closely to what goes on around us. So no, he was not ready for pose. He did propose to Lauren and she said yes, and they moved to Denver, not far from me.
00:24:52.000 --> 00:24:57.000
And they broke up about a year and a half later because he lied to the ladies. He lied to himself. 00:24:57.000 --> 00:25:07.000
And talk about a lie compounding. Like a year and a half of your life because you lied that you could have been getting on with what you're supposed to be getting on with.
00:25:07.000 --> 00:25:13.000
That is heavy and that's a lot of pain. So we got to do this.
00:25:13.000 --> 00:25:18.000
And just say, liar, liar, you know what to do. Pants on fire.
00:25:18.000 --> 00:25:20.000
Hands on fire.
00:25:20.000 --> 00:25:27.000
That is right. So how are you going to use this, right? So things like, is your boss really as happy with you as they say they are?
00:25:27.000 --> 00:25:41.000
Or does that potential client really need to talk to their wife first? All these things like this little bitty areas in your life.
00:25:41.000 --> 00:25:42.000
I have never…
00:25:42.000 --> 00:25:55.000
You just have a little more intel. All right. So let's keep going. And no talk from… Oh, wait, no talk for me would be complete without giving Lance Armstrong a hard time because he deserves it. He really does because he almost tanked our whole entire sport with performance enhancing drugs that he never
00:25:55.000 --> 00:26:08.000
And so he lied about it for about 20 years. He happens to be textbook liar. Let's We're going to see three videos, three little videos because we're sharpening your sensory acuity right now, okay?
00:26:08.000 --> 00:26:17.000
And you got to respond in the chat, how many lies do you see? We're going to see three videos, so your answer has to be one, two, or three.
00:26:17.000 --> 00:26:18.000
All right. Here we go.
00:26:18.000 --> 00:26:25.000
I have never doped. I've never taken performance against drugs. My best defense is I've never tested positive.
00:26:25.000 --> 00:26:34.000
All right. How many lives do you see? Type it in the chat. One, two, or three. Rachel, give me the report.
00:26:34.000 --> 00:26:43.000
All right. So it looks like we have a lot of twos, a few threes, a sprinkle of ones in there, but it looks like threes are starting to take the cake.
00:26:43.000 --> 00:26:52.000
Oh, threes are taking it. All right, cool. So we're going to watch this again. If you said three, you are correct. Okay. Now, let me tell you why you're correct.
00:26:52.000 --> 00:27:05.000
Because this is not always so cut and dry. That third one is more of an up and down movement. All right. So when you
get back to your bank, when you get back to your business, when you're out with your family.
00:27:05.000 --> 00:27:15.000
It's not always so cut and dry, okay? So we're going to go from head nods, like obviously not matching the words because he's admitted things now.
00:27:15.000 --> 00:27:20.000
But then watch that third one really closely. Let me rewind it and Here we go.
00:27:20.000 --> 00:27:27.000
I have never doped. I've never taken performance against drugs. My best defense is I've never tested positive.
00:27:27.000 --> 00:27:32.000
Now, he did something else there that is going to come into play. You're really going to use this next time.
00:27:32.000 --> 00:27:36.000
When we do part two, look how he waved off the question.
00:27:36.000 --> 00:27:42.000
This is the universal sign. Can you see it right here? This is the universal sign for stop.
00:27:42.000 --> 00:27:55.000
It doesn't always mean deception is at hand, but it does mean, wait a minute, he does not want to be talking about this okay so did anyone see it differently the second time around?
00:27:55.000 --> 00:27:58.000
Type it in the chat. All right. All right.
00:27:58.000 --> 00:28:04.000
Yes. A lot of folks. Yes, they did. The whole body moved up.
00:28:04.000 --> 00:28:05.000
Yep, up and down. Yeah. Yep.
00:28:05.000 --> 00:28:09.000
I noticed that too. Also more hand movements I noticed later on as we went. So yes, yes, and yes. All right. That means we are growing a body of experts here. Let's keep at it.
00:28:09.000 --> 00:28:14.000
Yep, that hand. Yeah.
00:28:14.000 --> 00:28:20.000
We are. We are. We got some fraud fighters with us. Okay, so here's the deal. This is key.
00:28:20.000 --> 00:28:25.000
You always got to file away how people behave because people have patterns.
00:28:25.000 --> 00:28:34.000
That they do every single time. Okay. And so once, and this is what I did on a bike, once you understand someone's patterns.
00:28:34.000 --> 00:28:46.000
You know what they're thinking because they're not going to deviate from that unless There's deception at hand, right? So you're looking for change. You're looking for difference, okay? So we may see Lance again. I don't know for sure,
but we may see him.
00:28:46.000 --> 00:28:56.000
Remember this, okay? And let's keep going. We got to do this and just say because it'll make you feel warm and cozy inside and just say liar, liar.
00:28:56.000 --> 00:28:59.000
Pants on fire. All right, you got it. Yeah. Question. Let's do it. Let's do it.
00:28:59.000 --> 00:29:05.000
Okay, I have a question, though, Tracy, right? Being the empath that I am.
00:29:05.000 --> 00:29:06.000
Uh-huh.
00:29:06.000 --> 00:29:12.000
You almost feel bad. When Lance came out, I felt bad that he felt like he had to lie, that he did these things.
00:29:12.000 --> 00:29:24.000
How did you regulate the emotion of When you're bringing empathy to the conversation, but also trying to protect yourself and the integrity of truth.
00:29:24.000 --> 00:29:36.000
That is a good question. And I am an empath as well and actually um So there's a couple things with that. And that's why we're not seeing really a lot of true crime.
00:29:36.000 --> 00:29:54.000
In this because it it makes me sick, like the energy of it. And that's why when I when I train with the law enforcement, I have to really watch myself Because it's nastiness after nastiness after nastiness, like all in videos.
00:29:54.000 --> 00:30:01.000
And sometimes like in a 40 hour class, I've had to take a break for an afternoon because I just like, it makes me ill.
00:30:01.000 --> 00:30:05.000
So being an empath is, I'm going to say a good thing, right?
00:30:05.000 --> 00:30:11.000
But you have to learn to manage it and you have to understand, okay, this is me and that is you.
00:30:11.000 --> 00:30:20.000
And you come first, right? I mean, like me Do you get that like the empath person, okay?
00:30:20.000 --> 00:30:34.000
Is first. This is not always about creating gotcha moments It's really not. Most of the time it's not. When in business, if it's a got you moment, there's usually someone with a badge in your office.
00:30:34.000 --> 00:30:46.000
What we're talking about is answering unspoken questions, right? Because you can really make someone's day better just by understanding that they're not having a good day. Because what's the number one lie?
00:30:46.000 --> 00:30:51.000
I'm fine, right? You ask them how they are. Fine. Things are not fine. Okay. Like, you know that. 00:30:51.000 --> 00:30:59.000
So I think it's a really good boundary between me and you.
00:30:59.000 --> 00:31:11.000
Realizing that you do come first. And if someone is feeling stressed enough to lie in that moment there there's They're under threat, right? Because people don't lie, only just a few people lie just to lie.
00:31:11.000 --> 00:31:28.000
And they're in cycle, they can be in like psychopathy type Folks, which actually tend to rise to the top in business because they really like power, but they don't have emotion and they don't often understand the difference between the outside world and the inside world.
00:31:28.000 --> 00:31:32.000
So that's probably a little bit too deep. Does that answer your question a little bit?
00:31:32.000 --> 00:31:37.000
It does. And we've got some great commentary in the chat about protecting your energy.
00:31:37.000 --> 00:31:38.000
Mm-hmm.
00:31:38.000 --> 00:31:50.000
Boundaries, lies being self-dissent self-defense. So I think there's a lot of framing too, which I love that our audience is taking away that it's not a got you, we're going to start a hashtag revolution on social media when someone posts with
00:31:50.000 --> 00:31:51.000
Yeah.
00:31:51.000 --> 00:31:57.000
Hashtag POS, but more tactical and especially as we move into part two of how to leverage that in our strategy.
00:31:57.000 --> 00:32:11.000
Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's about understanding like like if we can take The thing that's really hard and the reason that I get railed sometimes on social media, because I do, like I finally crack the code on TikTok, um.
00:32:11.000 --> 00:32:23.000
Is that people can't often separate themselves like what I say versus what they think because it can trigger them. Right. And so you got to realize there's a boundary of, okay.
00:32:23.000 --> 00:32:36.000
All I'm doing is nonpartisan or um just like factual hey This guy did this, which probably means X, Y, and Z just based on studies. When people are like, oh, you hate him. No, I don't hate him.
00:32:36.000 --> 00:32:39.000
I get that he's having a hard time. There's probably a reason.
00:32:39.000 --> 00:32:50.000
That he did what he did. And there's probably a reason that that was the best option for them. A really good one is Prince Harry. Prince Harry kicked me off TikTok because of this.
00:32:50.000 --> 00:32:57.000
Directly, Prince Harry kicked me off tick tock okay because i had millions and millions of views.
00:32:57.000 --> 00:33:05.000
Because of the deception that was going on during his book launch and when they moved to America and the whole
thing. We're going to get into that in part two.
00:33:05.000 --> 00:33:15.000
However, I get why he did all of it, right? And I kind of feel sorry for the guy, but my job is, hey, let's look at deception. Let's have an example of it so you can learn for your life, right? So people don't always get that.
00:33:15.000 --> 00:33:20.000
And… Okay, let's keep going.
00:33:20.000 --> 00:33:21.000
Okay.
00:33:21.000 --> 00:33:37.000
Okay, I'm sorry. One last thing because the chat is heating up about insecurity and not having confidence. So when I think about How do we create more, is it psychological safety? Is it them or like how do we think about that if it's a lack of confidence? I think a lot of our audience members are
00:33:37.000 --> 00:33:38.000
So you're saying the liar has a lack of confidence or us as the one yeah yeah they do. There's something there's something going wrong for them.
00:33:38.000 --> 00:33:47.000
Tapping into. The liar. The liar has a lack of confidence or insecure
00:33:47.000 --> 00:33:52.000
And what you gotta get And this is what I get. This has really helped me.
00:33:52.000 --> 00:34:00.000
They're doing the best they can do with the information that they have, like to where this to where lying to you is the best option.
00:34:00.000 --> 00:34:08.000
Now, if you want to really dive into that. I watched that movie, I, Tonya.
00:34:08.000 --> 00:34:15.000
And you can get it on wherever you get downloaded movies. It's about Tanya Harding, right? Which we're going to talk about next time as well.
00:34:15.000 --> 00:34:22.000
But all of a sudden, if you just watch that, it makes everything she did make sense.
00:34:22.000 --> 00:34:33.000
And so maybe that's your homework is to do that because it's a great movie But I think that's the key is to say, okay, wow, something's going on for them. This makes sense for them.
00:34:33.000 --> 00:34:41.000
And take the person like don't make it personal And I think when you do that, you can get ahead.
00:34:41.000 --> 00:34:44.000
So, all right, I'm going to keep going. More questions later. Okay.
00:34:44.000 --> 00:35:01.000
Remember, you're always filing away what people are doing, right? Because you want to look for deviations. And so you want to really baseline people is what you want to do. If you're taking pictures of the screen, here you go. This is
from the work of Chase Hughes. He's a military interrogator.
00:35:01.000 --> 00:35:11.000
And we're not just looking at body language, okay? Because communication in its totality is what will shift. Okay. So it's nonverbal.
00:35:11.000 --> 00:35:24.000
And then it gets into verbal. So remember, we're not just watching anymore, but we're listening. Because actually, language, regular verbal language is a higher indicator of deception than body language.
00:35:24.000 --> 00:35:41.000
But if I told Rachel, hey, Rachel, you know what? We're going to do a statement analysis webinar. What do you say? She's going to be like, Tracy, that's not sexy. We're not going to do that. So that's why we do body language first, okay? Because it's real easy to catch on. And then we level up, okay?
00:35:41.000 --> 00:35:51.000
So these are some of the ways that we can start to shift our behavior, smooth and confident, insincere and stiff.
00:35:51.000 --> 00:36:04.000
Open or closed, focused or vague, like all of these things people have a normal way that they do things. And then when that new part of the brain kicks in, it all shifts. Okay. It can.
00:36:04.000 --> 00:36:10.000
Let's keep going because your job is to get good at looking for change.
00:36:10.000 --> 00:36:23.000
That's it. We're talking about faint movements and commentary that come and go really fast. If you can just get good at looking for change.
00:36:23.000 --> 00:36:40.000
You're going to be way ahead of the game. Okay, so one day, Lance woke up. He woke up just like any of us would do. And he goes, you know what? Today's the day that I need to admit my performance enhancing drug use. So he picked up the red phone and Oprah
00:36:40.000 --> 00:36:53.000
Answered, right? So let's answered Take a look at the conversation and I want you to just notice Two things. What's different between this video and the first set of videos that we saw?
00:36:53.000 --> 00:37:12.000
And are there any signs of deception or just things that are unusual okay so be ready in the chat. Here we go. So what's different and are there any other signs of deception during this time that he decided to admit his performance enhancing drug use. Here we go.
00:37:12.000 --> 00:37:23.000
Did you ever take banned substances to enhance your cycling performance? Yes. Did you ever blood dope or use blood transfusions to enhance your cycling performance? Yes.
00:37:23.000 --> 00:37:33.000
And all seven… of your Tour de France victories, did you ever take banned substances or blood dope Yes.
00:37:33.000 --> 00:37:42.000
All right. Put it in the chat. First, let's go. What was different Between this video and the first set of videos. 00:37:42.000 --> 00:37:47.000
What was different? Rachel, what are we seeing?
00:37:47.000 --> 00:37:48.000
Mm-hmm.
00:37:48.000 --> 00:37:53.000
I move eye contact, the nodding feeling of remorse, the nods, the body language, the demeanor, less movement.
00:37:53.000 --> 00:37:58.000
The nods matched with the word. He was calm, less defensive, focused. I mean, there's a lot in here.
00:37:58.000 --> 00:37:59.000
Wow. Okay, y'all are crushing it. Y'all are seriously crushing it. Okay, so… Whoever said head nod?
00:37:59.000 --> 00:38:05.000
Yes.
00:38:05.000 --> 00:38:13.000
I want you to email rachel Because you get a copy of my book, How to Detect Lies, Fraud, and Identity Theft.
00:38:13.000 --> 00:38:19.000
Per your snail mail address, she will send it to me And I'll send you a book.
00:38:19.000 --> 00:38:25.000
You are awesome. Okay. So, and here's the deal. If it wasn't you, don't send her that. There was one person, okay? So…
00:38:25.000 --> 00:38:30.000
We've got vanity monitoring the chat. She's going to copy, figure it out, and we will make sure you get that copy.
00:38:30.000 --> 00:38:31.000
Okay. All right. Cool.
00:38:31.000 --> 00:38:43.000
We have had questions of getting your information, Tracy. So for the team As we get closer to closing out our program, we will share Tracy's information for those that want to get in touch and of course connect on social media.
00:38:43.000 --> 00:38:52.000
Yeah, for sure. Okay, so let's talk about head nod. Truthful people do and say the minimum that they need to do and say to get their point across.
00:38:52.000 --> 00:39:06.000
The first set of videos, he was a bobblehead. And in this video And he said a lot of words. I have never joked. That's what he said in the video. And this matches a study from Elizabeth Loftus at the University of Texas
00:39:06.000 --> 00:39:17.000
That says truthful people do and say the minimum that they need to do and say to get their point across. And so Here, one word answer.
00:39:17.000 --> 00:39:22.000
And one head nod. Before, a lot of nodding and four times the amount of words.
00:39:22.000 --> 00:39:30.000
So we got that. Now, let's talk about his tone. Okay, tone is, here's the deal with tone.
00:39:30.000 --> 00:39:42.000
The first set of videos he was convincing And in this video, he is conveying. Okay, so if you're taking notes, take this down. Convinced versus convey.
00:39:42.000 --> 00:39:50.000
Convincing often connected to deception conveying often connected to truth. So we're stacking in.
00:39:50.000 --> 00:40:00.000
All the things that you can start to pay attention to. Now, any signs, other signs that say, wait a minute, maybe he's not planning on telling the whole truth.
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:05.000
Write it in the chat. Any signs that say, wait a minute, he's not planning on telling the whole truth. Or maybe there's not.
00:40:05.000 --> 00:40:09.000
I don't know. You type it in. What do we got, Rachel?
00:40:09.000 --> 00:40:19.000
We've got mouth movement, eyes, the smirk, a tense mouth, dry mouth, closed eyes, the lips, a lot of Focus on that, looking down, lip biting.
00:40:19.000 --> 00:40:20.000
Soldered.
00:40:20.000 --> 00:40:30.000
Okay, so let's talk about the lips. Lips are really good. What he did actually was now when you when your lips get tense Or you roll them back in.
00:40:30.000 --> 00:40:40.000
Like that. Like suck them in over your teeth. That says he's holding back emotion or holding back Information.
00:40:40.000 --> 00:40:49.000
Which is what happened in this interview. He only told 25% of the story just to get ahead of a very incriminating report that was coming out the next week.
00:40:49.000 --> 00:41:00.000
Because he always wants to look like the good guy according to his dad, who I met on a plane like randomly And that's a hallmark trait of a narcissist.
00:41:00.000 --> 00:41:01.000
Which, okay. All right. Okay.
00:41:01.000 --> 00:41:24.000
Okay, I have a question, though, if I can interrupt. Okay, so when you look at celebrities or other certain types of leaders, they've often been prepped for these interviews, right? Do you think that it's a Do you think that there's a miss in terms of prepping? Because many times they're told to stick to a script, which is
00:41:24.000 --> 00:41:25.000
Right.
00:41:25.000 --> 00:41:37.000
How we get to this point where we feel like they're not being truthful And then at what point do we take some of these lie detections that we're seeing And then how does that compare or challenge the accuracy of a traditional lie detector test if we were to put these same folks under it?
00:41:37.000 --> 00:41:46.000
Oh boy, you asked a big question. And okay, I want to get through. So I want to make sure we get through some stuff. So I'm going to answer part of it and I'm going to answer some of it real quick.
00:41:46.000 --> 00:41:52.000
The body can't lie. You cannot rub this stuff out. It's going to leak out somewhere. It may leak out in their feet.
00:41:52.000 --> 00:42:06.000
Okay. I get calls from dads who are in a custody battle. It's a Friday afternoon and they have to take the stand on Monday and they want me to help them with their body language on a Friday afternoon so Monday goes good and they can see their kid again.
00:42:06.000 --> 00:42:19.000
Like, what? That is the number one recipe to be completely incongruent, okay? Because talking about the wrong part of your brain taking over and
00:42:19.000 --> 00:42:30.000
Lie detectors are not, they do not work. Lie detectors is a prop that people think you got something on them. So they tell the truth more.
00:42:30.000 --> 00:42:40.000
That's how that is. We can get into that more. Okay, but I'm going to keep going and I can stay on after. We don't have to be done as soon as we don't have to. So there's a lot of questions. We're going to keep going though. Is it okay, Rachel, to keep going?
00:42:40.000 --> 00:42:41.000
Yes, I told you this audience is an active one.
00:42:41.000 --> 00:42:55.000
Okay. Okay. All right. Cool. So you're looking for these things like in a, did you know 40% of people lie in a job interview?
00:42:55.000 --> 00:42:56.000
Not surprised.
00:42:56.000 --> 00:43:02.000
Or on their resume, like in a material way. And that's a study from the Society of Human Resources Management and I believe the University of Florida.
00:43:02.000 --> 00:43:11.000
So these are some of the things you're going to need to see. You think you got a problem without someone in a job. You got a bigger problem if the wrong person's in that job, right?
00:43:11.000 --> 00:43:26.000
And things like, especially in banking, things like how are they really going to spend that loan money? Are they going to pay off gambling debt or is it something else, right? So you need to know these kinds of things, which are going to come out in an interview.
00:43:26.000 --> 00:43:34.000
Do not rationalize what you see away. I cannot. Tell you how important that is. I cannot emphasize that enough.
00:43:34.000 --> 00:43:42.000
Rationalizing it in a way you are… everything that you've learned, you're just throwing it in the garbage.
00:43:42.000 --> 00:43:46.000
And you're going to pay for it later. So ask a deeper question.
00:43:46.000 --> 00:43:53.000
That's what you got to do. Now, let's keep going. I think we got one more. Oh, and we got to do this. Liar, liar.
00:43:53.000 --> 00:43:57.000
Type it in the chat pants on fire.
00:43:57.000 --> 00:44:06.000
Okay, I think we got one more. I don't know how y'all are going to like me after this one, but can we do a little deflate gate, little Tom Brady? A lot of you are on the East Coast.
00:44:06.000 --> 00:44:25.000
And let's just… This is a really good one to understand your bias because as soon as Tom Brady came up, there was a lot of a lot of chatter in your own mind. So what was the first word that came in? Just type it in the chat. Some of you are going to say liar. Some of you are going to say goat.
00:44:25.000 --> 00:44:29.000
Some of you are going to say, really cute guy. What are we seeing in the chat, Rachel?
00:44:29.000 --> 00:44:36.000
Well, our headquarters are in Cleveland and we're Browns fans. So I'm going to take one for the team and say liar.
00:44:36.000 --> 00:44:48.000
All right. So that's a bias. Okay, that's a bias. So anyone, and not all bias is bad. You just got to understand your bias. You cannot get away from your bias, okay?
00:44:48.000 --> 00:45:05.000
But you can understand it and do your best to focus on the empirical data so you can make the best decision. So you can inform your decisions more effectively. And that's really what we're at. And if you're stuck in your bias, you're missing it, okay?
00:45:05.000 --> 00:45:15.000
This is Tom's first press conference about Deflategate. We do not have time to baseline them. You've seen them on TV all the time. He's smooth as silk. He's got it all handled.
00:45:15.000 --> 00:45:22.000
We're going to watch two little clips. And I want you to notice, are there any signs of deception? Here we go.
00:45:22.000 --> 00:45:33.000
You know, I didn't alter the ball in any way. I have no knowledge of anything. I have no knowledge of any wrongdoing of any sort. Yeah, I'm very comfortable saying that. I'm very comfortable saying that.
00:45:33.000 --> 00:45:45.000
Nobody did it. As far as I know, I don't know everything. I also understand that I… was in the locker room preparing for a game for five. I don't know what happened over the course of the process with the process
00:45:45.000 --> 00:46:01.000
The footballs. I would never do anything outside of the rules of play. I would never, you know have someone do something that I thought was outside of the purpose. I was very shocked to hear it, so I almost laughed it off thinking it wasn't
00:46:01.000 --> 00:46:10.000
You know, that was more sour grapes than anything. And then it ended up, you know, it ends up being a very serious Then he was asked point blank.
00:46:10.000 --> 00:46:15.000
If he was a cheater.
00:46:15.000 --> 00:46:23.000
I don't believe so. I mean, I feel like I've always… played within the rules. I would never do anything to break the rules. I believe in fair play and I respect the league.
00:46:23.000 --> 00:46:31.000
Everything that they're doing to try to create a very competitive playing field for all the NFL teams.
00:46:31.000 --> 00:46:32.000
I'm sorry. That is worse than Lance Armstrong. I'm sorry.
00:46:32.000 --> 00:46:44.000
Okay, let's break this down. Well, the Super Bowl. Okay, so the Super Bowl is not as big as the Tour de France. It's just not. Okay. So like it is in America, but worldwide, like it's just not now.
00:46:44.000 --> 00:46:50.000
If that's the angle you meant on that. Okay, so let's take this first First video.
00:46:50.000 --> 00:46:51.000
No, I meant the number of lies.
00:46:51.000 --> 00:47:02.000
Oh, the number lines. Well, this is landslide for 20 years. Okay, so… Probably longer than that, knowing what I know.
00:47:02.000 --> 00:47:11.000
Anyway, first set of videos. Is, okay, so word error rate is a very high indicator of deception. And here's why.
00:47:11.000 --> 00:47:14.000
Is because he's stuttering, he's stammering, he can't get a word out.
00:47:14.000 --> 00:47:26.000
Our brain works at about 1,250 words a minute the top of our verbal capacity is about 333 words per minute. That's where court reporters are tested to.
00:47:26.000 --> 00:47:38.000
And what's happening here, the reason he's stuttering and stammering off his baseline is that he's going through three or four scenarios in his mind and he hasn't landed on one before it's time to open his mouth.
00:47:38.000 --> 00:47:43.000
Listen for word error rate. Listen for the words that people choke on.
00:47:43.000 --> 00:47:49.000
They're very, very telling. It takes six organs for us to make a sound and the body doesn't want to lie.
00:47:49.000 --> 00:48:01.000
And so they'll actually shut down just instantaneously in the middle of a word if that word has a problem with its truthfulness. Okay, so listen to that. Don't rationalize it away.
00:48:01.000 --> 00:48:17.000
So he also says, no one did it. As far as I know, which is a very different statement than no one did it Full stop, okay? So he keeps talking, right? And that's that rule from the University of Texas.
00:48:17.000 --> 00:48:22.000
Whenever people just keep talking, be careful of those qualifiers, okay? Now, next.
00:48:22.000 --> 00:48:29.000
Set our next video. Are you a cheater? There's a lot that happens before he opens his mouth.
00:48:29.000 --> 00:48:42.000
For one, he starts to run in place. Do you see that? He starts to run in place. And that's because deeply unconsciously, this is a threat. This is a very threatening question. His feet want to go. Unconscious mind says, we got to get out of here. His conscious mind says, nope.
00:48:42.000 --> 00:48:49.000
We got to stay. So you see that running in place and then he smiles really big. He smiles really big.
00:48:49.000 --> 00:49:08.000
And there's a term for that. Is called Duper's Delight. When someone smiles real big at a question that is um there's no reason to smile about, right? And then he rolls his lips in And at this point, we're up to five hotspots because we don't want to incriminate on one tell. We want a cluster of tells, right?
00:49:08.000 --> 00:49:11.000
So we're up to five right now. And then he says.
00:49:11.000 --> 00:49:18.000
I don't believe so. That's a yes or no question. That is four times as many words as he needs to say no.
00:49:18.000 --> 00:49:32.000
Or two times as many words as hell no. Okay, so we got a lot of deception in here and a lot of signs and I'm sorry, Tom Brady, Patriots and… Bucks fans, but we got to do it. We got to sing.
00:49:32.000 --> 00:49:46.000
Liar, liar. Pants. On fire, right? So, okay, we got to start to wrap this thing up. So let's um Let's see. Oh, if you want to know more about lie detection Here's your QR code.
00:49:46.000 --> 00:49:58.000
I will send you videos of famous people lying on TV. I got Tanya Harding. I got Sarah Palin. I got a bunch of them, okay? I'll send you those videos.
00:49:58.000 --> 00:50:08.000
Also, I'll give you all my social handles like Facebook, LinkedIn and I think I put TikTok on there. I'm back on TikTok after getting kicked off.
00:50:08.000 --> 00:50:20.000
And as long as TikTok's in business, we'll see what happens on Sunday. And then I'll put you on my mailing list. And every month I send out a newsletter about who's lying.
00:50:20.000 --> 00:50:39.000
And it's a super popular mailing list. So do your QR code and I will give Rachel the info if for some reason, this doesn't work for you. And we talked about Facebook and LinkedIn and TikTok. I do a little analysis whenever. I did one on Gavin Newsom this uh
00:50:39.000 --> 00:50:47.000
Was it yesterday? Yeah, I don't know when things happen so um and of course my podcast, Truth Lies, and Cover-Ups. Now.
00:50:47.000 --> 00:50:54.000
Oh, and if you want to copy my book, why don't you want a copy of my book? But you can find that on Amazon. You can find it on my website.
00:50:54.000 --> 00:51:00.000
And it's just 15 bucks. There's a quick reference guide, what to look for before you go into a meeting.
00:51:00.000 --> 00:51:01.000
So… Ooh, all right.
00:51:01.000 --> 00:51:04.000
Yes, Terry Moore is our winner of the book. Thanks, Terry. Shout out to you. Congratulations.
00:51:04.000 --> 00:51:17.000
All right. Okay, cool. Now, here's the deal. Let's um Let's put it to use and then I'm going to turn it back over to Rachel. We got like three minutes. Okay, so I'm going to, we're going to play a little game.
00:51:17.000 --> 00:51:27.000
Of two truths and a lie, I'm going to stop my share All right, stopping the share. Cool. All right, here we are now And I want to get the chat up too. Let's see if I can see the chat. Oh, good. Okay, great.
00:51:27.000 --> 00:51:33.000
Here's what we're going to do. You've been watching me for an hour.
00:51:33.000 --> 00:51:40.000
And I'm going to tell you two truths and one lie, and you have to figure out, you're going to put in the chat box which one's the lie.
00:51:40.000 --> 00:51:45.000
Okay, you ready? Here we go. Okay.
00:51:45.000 --> 00:51:52.000
Let me get this right. Okay, my brother just bought a ferrari.
00:51:52.000 --> 00:52:00.000
And I didn't sleep that great last night. And I once sold Lyle Lovett.
00:52:00.000 --> 00:52:06.000
A cowboy hat. Which one is the lie? Ooh, they're going by fast.
00:52:06.000 --> 00:52:08.000
A lot of threes in the chat. A couple of twos. There's the last… Number three is dominating the chat, although we've got I'm in there.
00:52:08.000 --> 00:52:26.000
A lot of threes. It is. I think it is. You're very good at the… analysis rachel Okay, so I'll let you know. Number one, my brother did just buy a Ferrari. They're awesome. You should get one if you can.
00:52:26.000 --> 00:52:32.000
Number two, I did not sleep that great last night. I kind of woke up and then I eventually went back to sleep.
00:52:32.000 --> 00:52:42.000
But I'm going to give it a thumbs down for last night. Okay, and which leaves number three, I did not sell Lyle Lovett a cowboy hat.
00:52:42.000 --> 00:52:49.000
My friend did. Okay, so if you said three, why did you say three?
00:52:49.000 --> 00:52:51.000
Put it in the chat. I want to know. Because you have a 33% chance
00:52:51.000 --> 00:52:56.000
The head, shaking direction of your head. The head shakes, head movement, your tone and language.
00:52:56.000 --> 00:52:59.000
Yeah. You know what I felt? You know what I felt myself do is I slowed down.
00:52:59.000 --> 00:53:03.000
The head movement, your eye experience.
00:53:03.000 --> 00:53:11.000
I slowed down my pace of speech, right? So you can listen for pace of speech. You can listen for volume.
00:53:11.000 --> 00:53:25.000
And yeah, I did. I paused. I had to think about it a little more right so So yeah, cool. All right. So Rachel, I'm going to let you, we can do questions or I can just turn it back to you. We can be done because we got part two, y'all part two.
00:53:25.000 --> 00:53:37.000
Do not. Do not miss it. It is going to be awesome. We're going to talk about… John Monet Ramsey, we're talking about that. Prince Harry, Meghan Markle.
00:53:37.000 --> 00:53:43.000
And more with forensic linguistics. So you want to do that and that's on, what, February 19th or so?
00:53:43.000 --> 00:53:49.000
Yes. So vanity, thank you so much for being here. If you don't mind sharing that slide.
00:53:49.000 --> 00:53:55.000
We are going to try and take a couple of questions. There's a few housekeeping items that I absolutely want to share.
00:53:55.000 --> 00:54:19.000
I hope you've taken away some practical strategies that you can implement immediately You know, whether it's improving your negotiations, strengthening your hiring process that's so critical or simply navigating everyday conversation. And for those of you who are not key for women members, I don't know why at this point, but for those of you who are not members, please use the QR code on the screen.
00:54:19.000 --> 00:54:35.000
Or go to key.com forward slash join K4W, the numberw. So we can connect you with our community of experts Women in Business, are programs open to all and we want to make sure that we empower you on your journey to success
00:54:35.000 --> 00:54:43.000
Which is why our programming will always be free. Our local events, our national events, we encourage you to participate in this phenomenal group of folks.
00:54:43.000 --> 00:54:50.000
And don't forget, as you can see on the screen, we are coming back for part two, Wednesday, February 19th.
00:54:50.000 --> 00:55:02.000
Mark it on your calendar right now. Use that phone. To make sure that we have a follow-up conversation with Tracy. Also during the registration, you have the ability to submit your questions beforehand.
00:55:02.000 --> 00:55:15.000
That really helps us to inform and influence our future programming, as well as prepare Tracy for her presentation next month. So I highly encourage you to register and sign up as soon as possible. And thanks so much.
00:55:15.000 --> 00:55:35.000
Yes, this is a phenomenal program. With that, I'm going to say, Tracy, we did have a couple of questions in terms of you know, do these concepts also apply from the neurotypical versus the neurodivergent that may be on the spectrum do the same rules apply.
00:55:35.000 --> 00:55:52.000
Okay, yes, and then we're going to do the question above that. Okay, so the reason I know yes, I have not done a bunch of like book study in this. I know this because my husband is a rocket scientist. He's very much like Sheldon on Big Bang, who is neuroatypical, okay?
00:55:52.000 --> 00:56:22.000
And so the thing about he cannot lie he can't it When he tries to, it's hard on him. And it shows up right away like um I'll just tell this quick story. So he remodeled our house. He's very handy. We didn't have a kitchen at one point. And all I had was like a 1982 hot plate and or like a hot skillet thing like my mom used to fry chicken in and a microwave. That's what we had.
00:56:22.000 --> 00:56:26.000
We've been working all night on this project. We went to the store.
00:56:26.000 --> 00:56:31.000
And see, he doesn't want it because we needed some hot to eat at the store. He does not like, you know that chicken that they have?
00:56:31.000 --> 00:56:38.000
Well, the rotisserie chicken is so awesome. Smells good when you walk by the little station.
00:56:38.000 --> 00:56:52.000
He doesn't like that stuff because he thinks there's not there's too much work for the amount of effort that he has to get the chicken off the bone, right? So he's like a cost benefit guy like everything he does.
00:56:52.000 --> 00:57:06.000
So I said, Matt, look, it's hot. It's tasty. It's right here. We don't have to cook it. Can we just have chicken? And he goes Yeah. And I said, all right, I know you don't want the chicken. Let's find something else.
00:57:06.000 --> 00:57:12.000
And there was, I've never seen this before. I said, you got to find this whole story. You got to find something we can eat now.
00:57:12.000 --> 00:57:28.000
And up above that chicken Because, you know, there's shelves on the stand there was a turkey breast. I've never seen one before, never seen one since. And we got that. So you can actually make someone's day better just by
00:57:28.000 --> 00:57:38.000
Understand if they're lying to you or not. Neuroatypical, is it applicable? In very many ways, yes. I think it depends how far they are down the scale. Everybody has a baseline.
00:57:38.000 --> 00:57:51.000
And you can always see when someone gets off the baseline now How do you explain, next question, how do you explain those who are experts in NLP? I am a master practitioner of NLP. I'm also trained in hypnosis and Hawaiian huna
00:57:51.000 --> 00:58:07.000
As well as all the certifications with law enforcement. And so it's called neuro-linguistic programming which i think is a name that really doesn't do it a lot of service It's neurolinguistics. It's the study of your thought and your self-talk and how that creates your reality
00:58:07.000 --> 00:58:22.000
I was a therapist for eight years. That's how i know how to read people because you'd be surprised how many people come into therapy and lie to you. I'm like, okay, wait a minute. We got to We've got to change what's going on so you can get some results.
00:58:22.000 --> 00:58:32.000
It's very powerful and everybody should know a little bit of NLP and really dive in because it'll change your world. So, okay, other questions, Rachel.
00:58:32.000 --> 00:58:46.000
I think we're at just about at time. So with that, I want to give you just the last 30 seconds of wording to close this out, but to say thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone that registered, who wasn't able to attend.
00:58:46.000 --> 00:59:02.000
All that did attend. I hope your pants are not on fire when you live here, nor that we use these for the right reason, not to catch folks, but to have better processes and outcomes overall. But we want to thank you all for being here. Thank Tracy for being here and sharing her expertise.
00:59:02.000 --> 00:59:08.000
And with that, I'll say have a fantastic rest of your day. I hope your year is off to the great start.
00:59:08.000 --> 00:59:13.000
Writing your next chapter keep rising Tracy, I'll send it over to you, the last comments.
00:59:13.000 --> 00:59:21.000
Last comment, because some of you are worried you're like, Tracy, there's one thing rattling around in your mind. You're saying, Tracy, when you raced against Lance, who won?
00:59:21.000 --> 00:59:27.000
Aren't you curious? Well… It was me.
00:59:27.000 --> 00:59:28.000
Love it. Big congratulations. Thanks. Have a great day.
00:59:28.000 --> 00:59:35.000
Thanks, everybody.
In this engaging session, Traci Brown discusses how to instantly spot when someone’s pants are on fire, and how you can put to the test your newly acquired skills of body language and verbal patterns observation.
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